Which brings us to this:
I've gotten a lot of questions about navigating the comment stuff. People, minus the tech savvy ones, don't really get how to comment on the bloggity. So, assuming this works, you should be able to sign in with your facebook, twitter, or yahoo accounts. Or as a guest. Supposedly.
I'm not entirely sure if it will work.
Comment to help me test it out.
So now other stuff.
I have to finish packing still. I just haven't gotten to finishing it. There are a mere TWO DAYS until I leave. And wow, I'm starting to get nervous. Nervous just about being there so long. Nervous about lots of stuff. Nervous about leaving friends and family. Nervous about changing.
But mostly, I'm worried about my own ability to trust God. Sometimes it seems so easy. He's the God of the whole universe, not trusting Him seems stupid. But other times trusting the God of the universe means going against everything to do something that seems absolutely impossible with what seems like nothing.
Sometimes that's hard.
It's worth it, but it's hard.
This is the part where I'm going to choose to be a lot more honest than I'd really like to be.
Some days, I don't want to live my life in submission to God. Even though I know (remember, the difference between knowing something and knowing something.) that anything He has to offer is better than everything anyone else has to offer, some days I'd rather live doing my own thing.
Some days, He is all that I could possibly want. But.. not every day.
Not every moment of every hour of every day.
That's how it seems like it should be.
Some days I don't even want to work on making it there. Some days I look at where I should be, and I just want to cry because it seems like this far off place, thousands of miles away, that I'll never be able to reach.
Sometimes I look around and see all this potential for everything to be better than it is now. For everything to improve. And I hope and hope that we can reach that. But at the same time, there is that lingering cynicism that says, "We can never get here. How dare you even try to get there? You don't even know HOW!"
How does one overcome that? How do I know that the God that I know can do anything can do anything?
Okay, so now that I've worn my heart on my sleeve, here's a funny picture to distract you from Emily's epic failure.
Don't even start talking about being nervous and having fears and worries and being away from home for sooo long!!!!! I need to believe that one of us has NO WORRIES!!!
ReplyDeleteI am proud of you. You set out to listen for God and you're acting on it. I am proud of you.
ReplyDeleteAunt Becky
Trusting that you will be protected and living authentically is the hardest thing in the world. Uncle Jeff and I are SO proud of you. Please don't worry - we will be praying for you every day.
ReplyDeleteAunt Rita
Your going to have a great time, trust me. I know you will, cause you know, its you, how could you not have a great time?
ReplyDeleteEm, you're so brave for going! You're nervous now, but just wait until you get there and see those kids in person for the first time...it will all be worth it.
ReplyDeleteAs for the whole looking at where you need to be and feeling so far away from it...we both know I'm not exactly on a quest to be closer to God, but I definitely know what it feels like to look at where you would LIKE to be and then realize how far you are away from that. It's frustrating and sometimes it honestly just makes me want to throw in the towel and give up, but I think that if we just keep trying, even if it feels like we're not getting any closer, someday we'll look up...and holy cow, we'll be there.